To Be Or Not To Be or What Next?

It’s summer and I’m finally finished college. So I enjoy a sleep in …and another !

However, that tingling motions of mind, enter before I rest at night. Indeed, my mind is trapped within a tornado of swirling thoughts in what I self-define as ‘’What’s Next Akwardoly Syndrome’’!

Thankfully, eventually my mind tends to kick these thoughts out, and I nod off!

Nevertheless, the dreaded question is so frequently asked, ‘’ What would you get out of that degree?’’
Or would that degree get you a job in……Or the darkest of them all, ‘’ What’s next now’’.
Hollow is the voice of mine, which stammers, ‘’ a well, I could do….’’Uncertain that I can actually do this that I state!

You see, my degree was an English & History. Now, you possibly understand my problem.
The Degree, I did this after a 1 year course in journalism; a course I finished with the belief that I was going to be a journalist- a damn good one too!

I did that journalism course mid- recession and although I wanted the profession; I would decide to defer my dreams and get a degree that would make my CV more shiny and sparkly!

Consequently, it’s not that the wish to work in the media has vanished. Rather that I know that the path of media is as overcrowded as Irish pubs at Christmas!

Secondly, I know it sounds bad, but after a four year degree programme I should maybe get a year to think about my future? Maybe whisper the words ‘’ A year out ‘’. Or Maybe not, as I shudder at the answer.

Therefore, The truth is I would prefer to decline to answer these questions of innocent conversation.
Or {Yes this piece is littered with ORS] possibly remain firm on my wish- that is to become a Journalist. Like surely it is I who shall choose to blow out the candles of my dreams!
…Strangely, Elton John and Candle in the wind has entered my head. Perhaps, a metaphor for my dreams sliding away. Is that a tear in my eye, or my recent recurring hayfever.
My mind, is slipping into its own world; a cup of caffeine is dare I say, seriously in need.

Is pondering thoughts worthless? Is that our minds own unique way of distracting you from what I wish not to discuss, my future.

Currently, if Facebook had a section for Mental Status mine would read – Common Confusion.
So the question is? Hold on to a dream? Or take a look down another avenues?

Hmm….

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